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😢And it certainly isn’t just about bruises. Many of the worst abuse scars don’t show on the outside.
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💥One of the most destructive failures of the church's handling of abuse is when the wife is expected to take the first steps toward humility, sacrifice, and service under the misguided promise that the husband will follow suit and do the same.Effectively, the wife is given the responsibility of leadership, while being expected to follow a person who isn't actually leading. At the same time her husband is told that he is entitled to lead, without being held responsible to lead where she is paradoxically expected to follow. The husband's failure to lead is then blamed on the wife's failure to lead in such a way that his following of her leadership feels like she is following his leadership, even though he is not willing to go where she is being required to lead. No...you are right...this makes no sense at all, and it isn't Biblical.
This foolishly self-defeating notion is often promoted by entitled church leaders who themselves expect the sheep to act in ways that they are entitled to ignore, because they are "the leaders." However, if we actually follow Jesus, then we must acknowledge that the leader is whomever is the first to die to self, the first to sacrifice, the first to serve, and the first to love - regardless of their social position.