The following is the first part in a series of articles that are each segments from the Freely Whole Safety–Exit Plan. The entire formatted, as checklists, document can be downloaded for Free here. I’ve broken it into parts for posting as articles. Part 1 can be read here.
Safety and Exit Plan Part 4
Budget Considerations
I’ve decided to add this category to this document, since it is info you will also need when filing for divorce/separation. Much of it can be determined from the above documents (in previous articles or the full document). But some women have never be a part of this process before, and most of us are in survival mode at that point, not easily able to think everything through. Whichever it is, it can be easy to forget expenses that need to be included.
You may not have all of these, and you may have other uncommon specifics. Use your above documents to help you find any others you need to include. Your budget (financial needs) will (or may, depending on your state) be used to determine child support, alimony, etc. so don’t short change yourself by neglecting to think longer term than the month to month bills. Just divide them to come up with monthly amount you’ll need to set aside for them—such as car taxes= annual amount/12.
- *House: Mortgage-PITI (principle, interest, taxes, insurance)/Rent, upkeep/maintenance, repairs, lawn/snow care or service, security service, HOA, …
- *Utilities: Gas, electricity, water, trash, phone, internet, TV, etc.
- *Auto: Payment, taxes & registration, insurance, gas & upkeep (oil changes, etc.), repairs, replacement
- *Food & consumables: Groceries, food out, school lunches, household cleaners, toiletries, and other items bought with groceries. (USDA has an online chart of what food costs range, for size/ages of family, for several different financial ranges—extremely frugal to extravagant, if you don’t know that expense, it can help you make a good guess.)
- *Medical: Insurance, payments/HSA, prescriptions, vision— glasses, contacts, solutions; dental, supplements, OTC, first aid, …
- *Personal: Clothing (include coats, boots, athletic, uniforms, etc.), hair/beauty (cuts, color, makeup, etc), personal hygiene, personal development and education, school tuition/fees, child care, pets, misc. other.
- *Household Misc: Office—paper, envelopes, stamps/shipping, printer, ink, subscriptions—magazine, news, delivery; tools, computer//tablet, safety deposit box, post office box, any other subscriptions,…
- *Life insurance. Investments/retirement. (Separate these, if needed.)
- *Savings: Short and long term for emergencies and replacements of needs, in addition to above investments/retirement.
- *Recreation/Entertainment: Gym or other exercise, kid’s sports fees, equipment, events—concerts, plays, movies, etc., lessons—music, etc., hobbies—supplies, etc.
- *Gifts & Charity: Family birthdays, friends’ events (birthday parties, etc.), weddings and anniversaries, Christmas, other holidays, other giving—church, charities, Operation Christmas Child, etc.
- *Debt: Credit cards, loans other than mortgage and car, school loans, any other debt owed to anyone. (You may be assigned half of any marital debt.)
- *Travel/Vacation, other trips: full costs.
Fill in your amounts in a chart/table, and total them. I’ve provided a simple one in the full document. I’ve added a couple of blank rows for you to add needed categories or divide categories given.
Separation and divorce is not something that any of us “want”. But when your “marriage” is not loving, caring, stable, or safe (emotionally and psychologically as well as physically and financially), steps need to be taken for our protection. Putting our heads in the sand and ignoring the problems are not wise and only lead to greater problems and more trauma and stress later. Please, even if your marriage isn’t “bad, all the time” but neither is it “good”, take the steps to prepare for safety, and for operating out of financial knowledge, outlined in these 4 articles taken from a checklist formatted free downloadable document, sooner rather than later. Even if you don’t plan to divorce or leave, that doesn’t mean that those things won’t be put on you–when you don’t expect. It is not always your decision or timing.
There will be much other information and documentation you may need to deal with during the process. But having this Safety & Exit Plan prepared for when you need it, (not just knowing what you need to gather but having actually gathered these things,) having these steps laid out for you so you don’t have to scurry to figure out what you need, and still be missing important items, will save you much time and stress later, when you have even less time and more stress than you have before you need this safety–and need it now.
Go to Free Download for full document.
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Living Coram Deo & freely whole
SDG!
~ Liberty—Life Restoration & Soul Transforming Creativity Coach
Empowering you to live a life that is Freely Whole—spirit, soul, and body—in Jesus!
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