Tag Archives: reflection

Oh Well!

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I lived on adrenaline for most of my adult life. But it didn’t serve me well. I’ve gone from superwoman, of 24/7/52 doing it all for everyone, to “Oh well”. At times, over the past several years, I’ve felt “Oh well” had become my mantra. But it was much needed, and served me well. I remember the first time I used that phrase during the divorce process about some deadline that was impossible to meet. “Oh well”. I can only do what I can do. I’m only human. First time I or anyone else acknowledged that? That I wasn’t going… Continue reading →

Peeling the Onion

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Healing comes in such layers. Sometimes we think things are good, and then another layer of the onion is peeled back, by new triggering events. And again, and again, we feel defeated. Not like conquerors in Christ. Not even like we’ll ever get through the battle. Defeated, alone, and perhaps ready to give up the fight. But somehow (by God’s strength, and those that “bear one another’s burdens” and pray for us) we plow through. We wrestle. We reflect. We process. And eventually we see a small ray of hope. Another layer of healing ❤️‍🩹. We don’t expect that wrestling… Continue reading →

In a Mirror Darkly

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Do you remember the climbing rope in gym class? You hold on so tight you’re hands are blistered. Hand over hand. After an hour you’re exhausted. You’re pouring out sweat. You’re butt is still nearly dragging the floor. That’s how 2022 feels to me. It’s been a year of hard, exhausting work with no gains. In several areas, I’ve worked hard, thought some negative issues were resolved/over, only for them to rear their ugly or evil heads once again. And the traipse continues on. It’s not that nothing good happened in 2022. Nor that it was full of life shattering… Continue reading →

Time the Enemy of Passion

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All my grand plans for Christmas crafting have been thwarted. All the clearance priced dies and stamps I’d waited patiently for those prices for, and have been longing to use, sit unopened on my desk. Time chose to be my enemy. Taunting me with promises of soon, only to present another barrier. The bits of downtime were necessary as truly DOWN time, not creative time. Beginning just before ThanksGiving, dad’s hospitalization, nursing home move, my business push, concert performances, finals, out of town workshop, … all took priority. The “needs” of life, pushing out the good, enjoyment of life. Yes…. Continue reading →

ThanksGiving Reflections—In the Midst

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I’ve been sharing ThanksGiving #gratitude quotes every day this month. And as I continue to press into gratitude, I also walk through this chapter of the saga. This week holds many Body Keeps the Score messages for me. Ones from previous years are healed, but scars don’t disappear. The reminder is there. Just not the sting. Sometimes of sad things. Sometimes of fearful things. Thankfully happy ones are in the mix. Always of God’s faithfulness. His strength. His love and care. Him getting me through. When I’m feeling something churning inside, and it’s not related to anything currently going on,… Continue reading →

Vinyl Priorities

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Too many vinyl projects had been stacking up here. Each of these were individual projects. But with no deadline. Not “urgent”. Not “really important.” So they sat as only completed designs in my Cricut Design Space, waiting to be cut and applied. None were hard. None took long to apply. But they weren’t urgent. So they patiently waited. For a stolen moment. Until I set a deadline. For all of them. Before I left on a trip. Deadlines make great motivators. They make things priorities, and important. 2 “tumblers”. 2 car decals. 2 Tshirts, (the other didn’t make the picture.)… Continue reading →

Reflections on Independence Day

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Today is a traumaversary. But thanks be to God for escape, healing and no triggers bothering me at all! 6 years ago today, was the beginning of the end of my life in abusive bondage. The final act of tyranny that led to my push back, and first steps towards independence, to my life of Freedom, as an autonomous entity. Thus, like the united States, I declared my independence. I fought a hard ugly war to be free from ungodly control and cruelty, with no voice. I was devistated and lost so much, and so many battles, but kept fighting… Continue reading →

Jesus Wept

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This is far from the first time that I find myself weeping at the vicious division in God’s home. It looks just like the world, trying to lord it over others, and each claiming God is on their side. Each claiming this is THE thing that matters most. What I don’t see is Jesus in it. Like the world, there is deliberate division being caused between men and women. Scripture is being used, not as God’s merciful love drawing people to Himself and rescuing them from sin, but as a weapon, twisted or taken out of context, to beat others… Continue reading →